Low self-esteem is a constant theme that runs through much of my client work.
By no means to do all potential clients come to me asking for help with this issue, of course, but it often comes up.
One person comes to me about his relationship challenges and through exploration we come to the conclusion that his partner is not able to respect him because he does not adequately respect himself.
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Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) has been around as a discipline since 1975. It has gone through a great deal of change and development since that time. The question many ask is ‘does NLP work’? Or is it just another an example of the placebo effect?
Placebo is an effect whereby a person’s condition, mental or physical, is improved even though the treatment is not ‘real’. The assumption is that the belief in the effectiveness of treatment is sufficient to make people well.
It strikes me that the placebo effect is, in itself an example of an NLP process at work. One of the core areas of work in NLP is on the way our beliefs affect our outcomes. If we believe something about ourselves, we tend to prove ourselves right. This is either because we tend to create the circumstances to support the belief, or we select the evidence to prove it.
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Weight-loss at Christmas is something of a nightmare. Someone told me the other day that in order to burn off the calories gained by eating just one mince pie you would have to complete about 25 minutes of Burpees.
Now, if you have ever tried to do a burpee you will know that this is not something you want to spend time on over Christmas.
The thing about a calorie control diet is that it focusses on just that one thing – calories. Our thinking around calories tends to be:
calories in = bad; calories burned = good
If you’re a fan, as I am – the fact that a mince pie is a gorgeous hit of spicy fruity sweetness and we are saying ‘hello’ to a potentially lovely time of year when we have our first one, doesn’t enter into the equation.
In our minds it probably looks more like this:Read more »
Here`s the scenario. You are on your way to a meeting. Perhaps it is work related, or a club committee, or simply catching up with a friend. You’re about to head into the cafe, or the office and you suddenly realise that you haven’t got a pen. You’re going to look a bit silly if you need to take some notes or jot down some figures, or even just put a date in your diary.
Just down the road from the venue for the meeting is a local supermarket – a pretty big one. They will definitely be selling pens.Read more »
Stage-fright on some level, is pretty much a given with many of the performers and speakers that I work with.
On one level it is completely understandable. Few of us like the idea of standing up there in front of an audience of hundreds, maybe even thousands and singing, dancing or even just speaking.
At the same time, many of my clients are hugely talented people.As one successful client put it ‘I beat myself up over being so nervous. I should be used to it by now.’
The thing that frustrates many performers is that they know that having this fear over performing can mean that they actually perform less well. Read more »
What sort of income do you have currently? How comfortable are you right now with how much you earn? Which of these statements fits you best?
These are broad descriptions, and I bet you can recognise yourself in one of them. Working with clients I find that individually they can be on any one of these descriptors. For some of them, money, and the lack of it, is one of their main issues. For others it is the thing that is lowest down their priorities. Money doesn’t make happiness, that’s for certain.
The interesting thing is that the actual ‘amount’ of money that clients have or earn doesn’t necessarily relate to where they are on this scale.Read more »
There are an expanding number of products, programmes and processes on the market which seek in various ways to ‘detox’ your body. I think the idea of purging your body of toxins from time-to-time is probably very sound. We are exposed in so many ways on a daily basis, to a bubbling cauldron of mysterious chemicals, hormones, and other substances. Sometimes we just need to give our bodies a good clean-out:
These are just a few popular ways people choose to do this.
What if we were to do the same thing to our minds? Maybe we should even be thinking about the mental detox first. With a clear, clean mind we are in the right place mentally to embrace the same process in our bodies.Read more »