Ghost of Christmas PastI know, I know – you’ve probably seen a dozen New Year blogs, New Year products and other activities based around the idea that now is the time to change yourself.

Thing is, it is true. Now is not the only time when you can take hold of your life and really get to grips with the changes, but in many ways it is the best time. Charles Dickens’ ‘A Christmas Carol’ is a delightful tale that can be seen as one man’s epiphany through the lessons of the three ghosts. It’s a bit of a stretch but I’ve used these three ghosts to show why, even though it is a cliche, this is certainly the best time to make those big changes in your life.

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questions-1151886-640x480 stock exchange freeWhen you first enter my office in Haywards Heath I always ask you two important questions.

Whether you are seeing me for a free appointment, or an intensive one-day breakthrough session, or even if you have begun a series of regular sessions, the first is:

‘Why are you here?’.

It’s not a surprising question in itself, and probably likely to glean more useful information to me as a therapist and coach than ‘What’s your shoe size?’

Usually, though not always, my client will tell me Read more »

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The fourth book in my series of three (yes, I know), has got to be Tim Ferriss’ ‘The Four-Hour Work Week‘.  It’s one of those books that shifts your reality dramatically while at the same time being a fun read.  Tim Ferriss has had a very interesting life and learned some great lessons along the way which he shares with us in a light-hearted and ‘you can do this too’ manner.

He tells us how he got to win the 1999 USAWKF Sanshou (Chinese kickboxing) championships with just six weeks training. He also tells us how he increased his income from $40,000 a year to $40,000 a week, and work less doing it.

More to the point he show us how to be successful in the true sense of the word.  Success in this context means having the life you want now, rather than saving up for a life in retirement that you may never attain if the dice-roll in your particular universe isn’t in your favour.Read more »

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discarded cigaretteWe all know that there are a plethora of solutions and approaches to smoking cessation – from smoke aversion to nicotine replacement, from hypnosis to acupuncture.  Naturally the scientific world, Government health organisations and charities are very keen to study the various approaches and pin down exactly which ones are the most effective.

There are a host of studies, and the outcomes vary slightly from one to another. Hypnosis, which is my favoured approach, (although I combine it with cognitive behavioural therapy and neurolinguistic programming) comes out quite well overall, usually significantly higher than nicotine replacement for example.

But I have to admit that there is something that consistently out-performs all the other techniques!
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Green traffic lightI was talking to a friend the other day – let’s call him Jim.  He’s always asking me about what I do and seems really interested in the coaching and hypnotherapy. He’s even begun to pick up a few books on neurolinguistic programming (NLP).

Jim’s a mechanic by trade – something he fell into by chance after leaving school and has been doing ever since – for twenty-three years, in fact. He’s also a great guitarist and an amazing cook.  Not that he would agree with that appraisal because one of Jim’s issues is his confidence and self-belief. That’s also why he is still a mechanic I suspect.  Because he ‘believes’ that is the only thing he can do and he’s ‘confident’ doing it.

But on the other hand, like so many of us, he knows that there can be so much more.

Just not yet.
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On Friday this week Harrison Ford crashed landed his small WWII training plane on a golf course in Los Angeles.  Despite fears the 72 year old appears to have been largely unharmed in the incident.

Normally I am a little bit averse to News reports of celebrity incidents. Every day many people are hurt, robbed, divorce, have affairs or pay for liposuction. It can sometimes seem that only the sufferings of the famous are worth reporting.

Harrison Ford’s accident touched several nerves for me however.  He is an apparently ordinary man who has had an incredibly successful career. Unquestionably a fine actor, he has played leading roles in everything from action films and science fiction to political dramas and romance, but he is probably still best known for his role in the ‘Indiana Jones’ films and the Star Wars trilogy.Read more »

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By now most people will have had at least a fleeting thought about a New Year resolution. Even if it is only to firmly commit to not bothering to make one this year.

Maybe New Year resolutions should be relabelled January resolutions, since the first month is often how long they last. (That’s actually not such a bad idea!)

My take on New Year resolutions, which I explore fully in my book ‘Making your New Year resolution work for you‘ [£4.99 on Amazon), is that behind every New Year resolution there is a bigger picture goal that drives it. Unfortunately we don’t tend to make that conscious connection between say, giving up chocolate (small picture resolution), and becoming fit and healthy (big picture goal). When we say we are going to stop smoking and use the money to save (small picture resolution) we are not necessarily fully connected to becoming financially independent (big picture goal).Read more »

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Note: This article was originally published in ‘Haywards Heath Matters’ in March 2013
Spring is here.  The weather is improving and there are daffodils, crocusses and primroses on the verges.  Now is the time when many people feel the urge to have a good clean-up of the house and the garden.  A real spring clean.
Whether or not that is true for you, the lighter evenings and the prospect of warmer weather can be quite motivating and sometimes it’s not just our physical surroundings that need a good de-clutter. Why not take the opportunity to have a look at making your life easier, tidier and more peaceful. Just putting pen to paper and making a few lists can be a good way to start.  So find yourself somewhere pleasant to sit, get a pen and a nice notebook and off you go!Read more »

For most of us, success in life is elusive.
In the busy day-to-day battle between chaos and the mundane, it is difficult to spend more than a few moments sometimes dreaming of what success would look like.
But that’s exactly what we need to do.
Every day.
Our dreams are where we start from in life, and if we continue to dream, they are also where we end up. As the song goes, ‘don’t dream it, be it’.
Different people have very different ideas about what they want to be, to have and to do. For some, success is about big money, fast cars and a beautiful home. For others it may be less concrete – a contented life, happiness, peace. We are our own judges on such things.Read more »

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